Saturday, June 22, 2013

Total fracking randomness from today!

   I'm going to put this here, because while it's not parenting related it's mom-life related. Since the first of the year I've steadily lost over 15 pounds. Even better, I've managed to maintain the steady weight loss without exercise, not that I'm bragging of my lack of fitness but rather I'm proud of the weight loss that I'm keeping up with.
   I'm now lighter than I was when I got married, I weigh almost as much as I did when I met Mac for the first time but I'm way less toned. Part of the plus side to this is I'm feeling more confident in my own skin. I'm wearing carpi's, skirts (that are knee length, not maxi skirts) and jeans that are loose and I'm down 2 sizes!
   None of that is as impressive as what I did today. Today I wore shorts, in public for the first time in over a decade! And my thighs don't rub when I walk anymore! If you don't get why I'm bragging about this, sorry I'm boring you.


   Nixon still is demanding help wiping his ass. I know he can do it, he just knows its easier if mom or dad does it for him. Tonight, after the especially hellicious morning we had together, he knocks on the wall and demands one of us helps wipe his butt. Mac tells him to wipe it himself. Nixon stays in the bathroom for a couple more minutes, then comes out sans undies and says "MOMMY I said I need HELP!"
   I get up and follow him back into the bathroom. I look at him, as he's got his butt in the air at me saying "I touch my toes mommy." and all I can think of is I'm so over this phase.
me: Nixon, I'll wipe your butt but you have to wipe mine next time I go potty. It's only fair.
Nixon: what?! No! You wipe my butt.
me: Yeah, no. If I'm going to wipe your butt, you need to wipe mine. That's fair, right?
Nixon: NO! I don't wipe you! You grown up, you wipe yoursself.
me: Well, if you're not going to do that, then you need to wipe your own butt.
Nixon: I need help.
me: Well, okay then. *I fold the wipe for him and show him how to wipe*
Nixon: Oh, I know how to do this!
me: So you'll wipe your butt and no one will wipe mine?
Nixon: Yep.

I leave the bathroom and fall onto the floor in the living room, where Mac sits on the sofa, and collapse into laughter. Mac "Well played", and all I can say is "I really never think before I speak to him." I might also need to start saving for therapy.

Ugg...why doesn't anyone tell you how horrible 4 is?!?

   Well, my Saturday is off to a fine start. How is everyone else's? I hope for your sakes, not anything like mine is going. Unless you are a mortal enemy of mine and then I hope you are having the same day times 5. Which would only be possible if you have 5 kids or quintuplets.

   Nixon is currently in his room, and is there until he decides to leave his room clothed. He's in his jammies, but is refusing to change for the day. Fine, I'm tired of this constant battle of the wills. Not going to change your clothes, stay in your room. Done!

   While I'm dealing with this at home before I've had my coffee even Mac is off waiting for a comic book signing at Third Eye Comics, where he's been since 7am. It's an ongoing theme lately. I deal with Nixon's tantrums and Mac is....well, anywhere but home. True, a lot of the time he's working or doing something work related, but this week it's also been him doing things he likes doing...alone. Which translates to he gets free time and I get? Another wonderful tantrum, strong-willed filled day of Nixon fun. *sigh*

   After 20 minutes in his room, Nixon came down and got dressed then asked to go see Daddy. Before we left (I made a cup of coffee) I warned Nixon that if he acted up and didn't listen to Mac or myself, I would bring him back home.

   We left the house and got to Third Eye Comics without issue. Nixon was a gem, sitting in his chair while I actually got to have a conversation with another adult about something I enjoyed! He started watching his PSP, but was soon enamored with a friend's pet rat. The rat was replaced by solitaire on our friend's phone, which Nixon was quite good at surprisingly enough.

    Everything was good, until Nixon decided to run around and stop listening. Enter me. I picked him up, carried him (screeching at the top of his lungs) to the car, and we left. He was warned and now I was following through. He was upset, wanted to go back to Daddy, but that wasn't happening.

   And Mac? He's still at the comic book store, waiting in line for the signing. To be fair, he did offer to come home, before Nixon and I got there, to help get Nixon ready. I declined because forcing Nixon to get ready wasn't going to fix anything. Nixon needed to make the choice himself.

   It's frustrating that my days are filled with tantrums and plans getting shelved because Nixon won't behave, but Mac's life and plans go on. It's a cycle we go through every 6-9 months. We'll be on really good and equal ground for a while than BAM! I'm losing all my sanity and he's getting a lot of breaks. It balances out in the end, it's just been a little harder since I suck at making friends. Wait, does a bottle of wine count as a friend? Cause if it does then I've had a couple new friends in the past two months, but it ended abruptly when I realized they were empty and I was tipsy.

Thursday, June 13, 2013

A little catch-up, because it's been a while

   Nixon and I have been having a rough couple of days. Really, it's not my fault or his fault, I blame it on the fact that I'm sick and he is having a hard time grasping that concept. I'm not sick-in-bed sick. No, I'm sick-have-no-voice sick, which to my chatty child who loves playing "Secret Agent Mom/Secret Agent Nixon" with me, is worse than just me lying in bed watching TV with him. Why? Because I can't talk to him.
 
  I've been battling a sore throat and dry cough for almost a week now. Over the weekend I lost my voice, for a day. Normally, that's the end of the my cold: lose my voice for a day and it all goes away. I wake up the next morning feeling right as rain. For some reason, this time, that's not happening, because a couple days later I've still got the cough, sore throat and I lost my voice AGAIN, today is the second day in a row I've been voiceless.
   That's not entirely true. I have a raspy whisper of a voice, but it does nothing but annoys Nixon because when I do talk it's weak and I end up coughing from the effort afterwards. And why wouldn't I lose my voice on the only 2 days Mac has to work this week?!? Because my body hates me and might be filing for divorce with this illness, who knows?

  Yesterday, Nixon decided to start mocking my voice. For some reason this seemed like a good idea to him. Despite Time-Outs and even spankings, he still persisted in mocking me.
 
   I ended up going to the doctor because on day 3, I still had no voice and the weekend was coming. I got lucky and was seen Friday at 10am. I'm thankful for the nurse and doctor who patiently listened to my raspy whisper voice while I explained why I was there.
   The end result? I was battling laryngitis from forceful coughs caused by my allergies but I was on the verge of strep throat so I was loaded up with antibiotics to kill everything, told to keep taking Claritin for my allergies.
   My voice returned weak and raw on Saturday and by Sunday it was back in full effect. Just in time for my birthday on Monday!

   Mac and Nixon woke me up Monday morning by bringing me coffee, donuts and gifts in bed! Nixon (and Mac) said "Happy birthday, Mommy" and Nixon was most excited about the donuts. Mac was most excited about the gift he had commissioned for me several months ago, that had finally arrived on my birthday: 
It's a watercolor painting of Nixon as Iron Man! It's incredible and I was beyond words when I saw it! 

   Nixon decided to tell me, the day after my birthday, "Good morning Mommy! You're old!" and he's been saying that every day since then. At least he was kind enough not to say it on my birthday.     

   Finally, the biggest most amazing accomplishment with Nixon happened this morning: He and I can now play real games of Rock, Paper, Scissors, Lizard, Spock! Even better, Nixon managed to beat me twice! He beat me fair too, threw the winner fair-and-square. But he does try to cheat!
   He also likes to "cut" me with his lightsaber and tell me "Mommy, I just cut off you arms and legs! hahahaha" That's what we get for letting him watch Star Wars Episodes 1-3.