When the kiddo is sick, mom gets the most uncomfortable sleep ever

   Nixon's got a cold. He's super congested but is also a total snot-faucet. It's a faucet that's got a slow but continuous leak.

   Now, when Nixon is not sick, he is the best sleeper ever! He sleeps through the night every night only getting up to go to the bathroom and then right back to sleep. However, when he is sick he wakes up in near hysterics because he can't breathe.
   That was what happened last night.
   Mac and I rushed upstairs to get him and calm him down. Nothing was working, he was only getting more upset and coughing harder as a result. It wasn't until I asked him if he felt like he was going to be sick that I understood why he was so upset: Nixon hates vomiting of any kind and really wants to be in the bathroom if he is going to vomit. Last night he had so much phlegm in his throat it was making him vomit.
   Poor baby.
   Mac grabbed him a small cup of juice and I rubbed his back while he was in the bathroom trying to let himself get sick. After a few minutes in there he finally started to relax and wanted to go back in his bed. Mac and I both sat on the floor next to his bed and waited for him to fall asleep.
   That wasn't happening. Eventually, Nixon decided dad had to go but he wanted me to get into bed with him. Thank gods I'm short! I crawled into bed with him and rested next to him for over half an hour. I think. A little after midnight, when I heard Nixon's breathing change to a deep sleep breathing, I tried to leave and go to my bed.
   Nixon woke up and asked where I was going. I told him and he freaked out! "No, Mommy, you can't leave me!". I caved, went to my nice big and warm bed only to grab my pillow and a blanket. I returned to Nixon's room and slept in the foldout flip chair he has in there.
   I slept there until he woke up at 6:45 this morning. He kept trying to talk to me and I am not a morning person. I got up and finally got to crawl into my nice warm bed....for a couple hours at least.

   My whole body aches this morning, from sleeping on that foldout chair. But, being Nixon's mom, I'd do it all over again, if he asked me too.

   Because, seriously, when he's sick I do anything to make him feel better. even if it means I've got a kink in my neck the next morning.

A little catch-up, because it's been a while

   Nixon and I have been having a rough couple of days. Really, it's not my fault or his fault, I blame it on the fact that I'm sick and he is having a hard time grasping that concept. I'm not sick-in-bed sick. No, I'm sick-have-no-voice sick, which to my chatty child who loves playing "Secret Agent Mom/Secret Agent Nixon" with me, is worse than just me lying in bed watching TV with him. Why? Because I can't talk to him.
 
  I've been battling a sore throat and dry cough for almost a week now. Over the weekend I lost my voice, for a day. Normally, that's the end of the my cold: lose my voice for a day and it all goes away. I wake up the next morning feeling right as rain. For some reason, this time, that's not happening, because a couple days later I've still got the cough, sore throat and I lost my voice AGAIN, today is the second day in a row I've been voiceless.
   That's not entirely true. I have a raspy whisper of a voice, but it does nothing but annoys Nixon because when I do talk it's weak and I end up coughing from the effort afterwards. And why wouldn't I lose my voice on the only 2 days Mac has to work this week?!? Because my body hates me and might be filing for divorce with this illness, who knows?

  Yesterday, Nixon decided to start mocking my voice. For some reason this seemed like a good idea to him. Despite Time-Outs and even spankings, he still persisted in mocking me.
 
   I ended up going to the doctor because on day 3, I still had no voice and the weekend was coming. I got lucky and was seen Friday at 10am. I'm thankful for the nurse and doctor who patiently listened to my raspy whisper voice while I explained why I was there.
   The end result? I was battling laryngitis from forceful coughs caused by my allergies but I was on the verge of strep throat so I was loaded up with antibiotics to kill everything, told to keep taking Claritin for my allergies.
   My voice returned weak and raw on Saturday and by Sunday it was back in full effect. Just in time for my birthday on Monday!

   Mac and Nixon woke me up Monday morning by bringing me coffee, donuts and gifts in bed! Nixon (and Mac) said "Happy birthday, Mommy" and Nixon was most excited about the donuts. Mac was most excited about the gift he had commissioned for me several months ago, that had finally arrived on my birthday: 

It's a watercolor painting of Nixon as Iron Man! It's incredible and I was beyond words when I saw it! 

   Nixon decided to tell me, the day after my birthday, "Good morning Mommy! You're old!" and he's been saying that every day since then. At least he was kind enough not to say it on my birthday.     

   Finally, the biggest most amazing accomplishment with Nixon happened this morning: He and I can now play real games of Rock, Paper, Scissors, Lizard, Spock! Even better, Nixon managed to beat me twice! He beat me fair too, threw the winner fair-and-square. But he does try to cheat!
   He also likes to "cut" me with his lightsaber and tell me "Mommy, I just cut off you arms and legs! hahahaha" That's what we get for letting him watch Star Wars Episodes 1-3. 

the day my son turned into teenage girl

   Today, Nixon was a monster. Maybe it was because I'm coming down with a cold and have zero tolerance for his BS when I'm getting sick. Maybe it's because I didn't have my morning coffee. Or maybe it's because we were spending Sunday morning grocery shopping.
   Nope, it's definitely all on Nixon and his totally epic tantrum and sudden diva behavior.

   It started with Nixon whining and pouting about putting on his shirt. How on earth does child hit the exact wrong tone with mom when she's not feeling well? Seriously, whining and screeching that he "can't find the right hole!" He had his head in the right hole, but had the shirt twisted so the armholes were in the front and back of the shirt, instead of st his sides. Honest-to-gods, this was end of the world type shit!

   At the store he was pretty good, munching on his little bag of snacks most of the time, until he decided he wanted to get out. I normally don't have an issue with him helping me, but when he won't stay with me and it's stupid crowded, he's better sitting in that fucking beeping car-cart he begged for as we walked into the store than getting out and driving everyone (including dad and I) nuts. He did get back in and was content for the final few minutes of the shopping trip, with the assistance of the PSP. Yeah, judge me, I'd judge me too if I weren't trying to get out of the store with my sanity and dignity intact.

   All was good...until we were placing items on the belt at the register. Nixon decided he had enough and wanted to run around the store. Look, I get it. Shopping is really boring. I can only do so much to keep him entertained while I'm trying to compare prices and find items on my list and coupons. Plus Mac isn't great with crowds but he did let me sleep in and I hadn't finished the lists last night because I needed him to go over them with me.
   My final straw was Nixon telling me no he wasn't going to listen to me. I left the club card and coupons with Mac, grabbed my mouthy little boy and headed out of the store...right into a Matchbox cars display. Seriously, who at Safeway hates me?! Nixon stopped in his tracks, said "Mommy, I want a new car. It's so lovely" and then yelled "NO!" when I told him we were going to the car without a new car. On the way out, he did a lovely move. He dropped to his ass, and spun on the floor just lying there looking up at me like "I won, now what?!" Now what, turned out to be: me stopping, grabbing the PSP from his hand and putting it into my jacket pocket, picking Nixon up off the floor and carrying him out of the store. All in less than 10 seconds after he dropped to the floor. *a special thank you to the asshole that decided to park right on the line next to my car. I had to put Nixon in on the passengers side which is the side Mac sits on so there is not much room. with a child in mid-tantrum I don't exactly have time to move the seat up and get more room to maneuver.* Nixon was finally in his seat and he says "Mommy, you need to tell my you are sorry, because you made me cry." I asked him "Are you going to tell me you are sorry for acting out and lying down in the store?" He says "NO because you should have bought me the car" and that was when I said "NO, my little love, you are wrong. You need to listen to "no" and just accept it. Not throw a tantrum and think that you will get your way" He decided to stop talking to me after that.

   Later in the afternoon he started his dramatic ways again. More tears, more demands, more foot stomping and mood swings. I swear to gods, somehow my son changed from a 4-year-old boy to a teenage girl and I'm not happy about it. There's only room for one moody bitch in this house and I claim that honor! I have the vagina I get to be the moody bitch!

   I love him, but today was a rough one.

and then I had my first heart attack!

   If you're friends with me on facebook, you may have already seen today's update:

What a long rough night Nixon and I had.....

..poor guy had diarrhea throughout the night, almost every hour I was getting up to clean him.

He's snuggled in our bed with Mac right now. I had to run to Target and buy more sheets for his bed, the two we had didn't make it through the night. Into the washer they went....

   What I couldn't put on there, was the nightmare that my day started with. Nixon has been battling some kind of stomach bug since Friday. I've done no less than 6 loads of laundry because of this bug. Friday morning Nixon slept until after 1130am! Yesterday he seemed back to his old self and was awake around 630am (but he did fall asleep on the sofa at 730pm Friday night). 

   This morning, I had to clean and help Nixon change into clean clothes at least 4 times during the night and I was exhausted. Almost every hour Nixon would be calling for me and I'd bolt up from my sleep and rush to him! I changed his sheets, made multiple trips up and down stairs for clothes or to put a load in the washer. 

    I wasn't too worried when I saw the clock read 1130am and Nixon wasn't awake. I figured he was sleeping to beat this bug. I did get up and start my day. 

I checked his bed, no Nixon.

I checked the floor of his room, no Nixon.

I checked the spare room, no Nixon. 

I went back into my bedroom and looked in there. The floor, the bed...no Nixon.

I finally woke Mac up and said the words no mother wants to say "I can't find Nixon!"

   While he stumbled out of bed I ran downstairs, feeling a panic bubbling up inside of me.  Nixon wasn't on the sofa, or the padded bench I made just for him. I didn't see him in the kitchen. 

   Finally I called out for him, "Nixon!", "Nixon, baby, where are you?".
   He comes wobbling from the area in front of the back door. "Mommy? I had an accident. I pooped my pants."
I have never been more relieved to hear him say those words! I almost always, ALWAYS, hear him go downstairs in the morning. He always comes into the bedroom to tell me he's awake. I'm pretty sure he was so tired from last night, he didn't know he was downstairs. It's frightening to think he might have fallen down the stairs. 

   I gave Nixon a bath, while Mac went and tried to clean his bed. After the bath I put him in fresh clothes and in our bed with Mac. I left to go to Target, for sheets and other necessities. 

   When I came home, both of my boys were sleeping in our bed. Mac had his arm draped across Nixon's back. Amber was sleeping at Nixon's feet. And my heart? My heart was overwhelmed with love and contentment when I saw them all together.