Thursday, March 8, 2012

Rock, Paper, Scissors according to Nixon **UPDATE**

   I'm nothing if not a well-prepared mother. My sole goal as a parent is to be ahead of the curve in awkward conversations (the sex talk), teaching Nixon the finer points of sarcasm (I'm sure he's getting it down. The other day his reply to something I'd said was "Uh, helllooooo?" complete with hands on hips and snotty teenage face.) and finally helping guide Nixon to a successful grasp of such potentially life-altering games as "rock/paper/scissor" (which has been my latest game of choice for us). Now, I can say he's not 100% sure of the rules of the game, or how to play, but kid's got the hand signals and names down pat! 


This morning, Nixon came into our bed a little after 9am. (WHY does he always pull this sleeping in late stuff when Mac is home with us? Why can't he ever give me a free pass and sleep in when it's just me and him for the day?!?!? Why am I asking *you*, I should be asking him, but since he can't read and usually every answer for any question I ask him is "no" or "What da hewl (hell in Nixonese), mommy?" I'm better off letting it go. Nixon brought BeBe, his much loved and lately abused teddy bear, and was very loving. Gave us hugs and kisses, asked me to snuggle with him (Well DUH! Of course I let him!) and was only a little goofy. 


He started doing Rock/Paper/Scissors with us, then said BeBe wanted to play. This is how it played out (more or less, I hadn't had coffee yet, so it might be a bit fuzzy)
me: Honey, BeBe can't play R/P/S
Nixon: yes he can. 
me: Okay Bebe....rock ( I make my fist)
Nixon: (holding BeBe's arm is straight out) See rock.
me: Paper (as I lay my hand flat out. I should mention BeBe has no fingers. He's a bear with only round paws on a slightly bent arm)
Nixon: Paper (pushed BeBe arm down "flat" in front of him)
Mac: How's he gonna do scissors?
me: I'm not sure, it's not like he's got fingers. 
Mac: Okay buddy, scissors (and thrown up two fingers)
Nixon: (takes BeBe and moves his arm so it is above him, kind of next to his head) Skissors for BeBe!
Mac and I: amazement and laughter at the same time. 
Nixon did all BeBe's positions again and called each one the same thing as before. 
Me: Did our kid just play R/P/S with his teddy bear who has no fingers or real hands?
Mac: Looks that way.
Me: Nixon, you're kind of really awesome. You know that right?
Nixon: (notices Mac and I are hugging at this point) NO HUGGIN' guys! 
* he comes over to break us up, but instead we have a full family hug with Nixon in the middle!


Mac wanted to teach Nixon "lizard and spock", but Nixon told Mac "No Lizard". That ended that real fast! 


**UPDATE** I can't believe I forgot this!! Nixon invented his own symbol/hand gesture for the game. He throws his hand out flat, like paper, but then arches his fingers upwards and says "Airplane!" How awesome is that?!?! I'm pretty sure airplane beats paper, scissors and possibly rock (if its a small rock) haha
Yeah, my kid is kind of way cool like that!


In other news...can anyone tell me why my cat was taking up more of the bed than I was and my husband was throwing elbows and knees in his sleep on me, like I was a practice dummy?? Arwen has slept in my bed for as long as I've had her. Lately she sleeps the long way from the edge of my side of the bed (so where as Mac and I sleep vertically on the mattress, Arwen sleeps horizontally on it, usually right by my head and torso area) , slowly stretching out longer and longer until I end up on Mac's side of the bed. Since he's on nights it's not a big deal...when he's not home. But on nights that he is home I get squeezed between my 10-pound but seemingly 4 foot long(!!) cat and my 6-foot husband, like last night when my cat had more bed than I did. 
And yes I know common sense would say "kick the cat out", however common sense has never met my cat. I kick her out, she comes back. I push her off the bed, she comes back then she cries and mews IN MY FACE until I roll away from her and she steals her spot back on the bed. We can't lock her out of the bedroom, because she'd just terrorize poor Amber out of spite, plus her food/water and litter box are there. The food and water is to keep Amber, aka FATTY, from eating both food dishes of food while Arwen gets none. 



This morning with the 5 of us on the same bed, I told Mac we needed a bigger bed. He quickly said "Good luck with that", followed by "or we could just stop letting everyone in our bed"....
I stand by my claim: we need a bigger bed! LOL

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