Saturday, December 1, 2012

Birth is just the beginning....


  For women, when giving birth in most cases, we lose all sense of modesty. I know when Nixon was in the process of making his debut, I found myself on all fours ass in the air with a room full of interns, nurses and a doctor who was elbow deep in my cervix for all to see for the safety of my child. And I could have given a flying frick! My sole concern was that Nixon was safe.

  That was just the beginning to life as a mom with privacy issues. I can't shower with Nixon awake and not have him come check in on me, asking if I'm "getting all pruney and making all the germs go away". I can't take longer than 5 seconds in the bathroom with a knock on the door and hearing him call out "Mommy, are you in there?". I've gotten used to it, because lets face it, if he's checking on me, he's not getting into trouble somewhere else in the house.

   But it's not just Nixon. The cats get in on the action too!

   And, as of yesterday, BeBe (Nixon's beloved teddy bear) as well. BeBe, apparently, can only "poo-poo" when I do. So Nixon will bring him into the bathroom and put him on the sink countertop  next to me.
   Today it played out like this:
*knock, knock*
Nixon: Mommy, are you in there?
me: Yes, Nixon, I'm in here, I just told you I was going to the bathroom.
Nixon: Oh. BeBe has to go poo-poo and he needs to be near you.
me: Nixon, you can't be serious. BeBe does not need to be near me to poo-poo.
Nixon: *opens the door* Uh-huh, mommy! He really does! (puts BeBe on the counter next to me) See? Now, leave him alone while he poo-poos.
me: *to BeBe* You know I'm going to blog about this ridiculous invasion of my privacy, right?
The worse part?!?! Before Nixon would take BeBe out of the bathroom, he had to see me wipe BeBe's butt! I had to wipe a stuffed bear's ass!!

Meanwhile, Mac can grab his Kindle or a magazine and go to the bathroom without being disturbed. He seems to think I can just tell Nixon to leave me alone while I'm in there and it'll magically happen. Moms, anyone wanna help me enlighten him on why this will NEVER happen??

Happy December :)

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