He may be an ass....but that ass is my kid!

  

this is the squeaker toy face

Three was a hard age. I think most parents agree that of the first few years, three is one of the hardest. The tantrums alone make you want to drink (or drug your child....some days it's a real struggle to decide which of those options is the winning one). Then there's the talking back, the never-ending "NO!" coming out of your child's mouth and the absolute power struggle over everything! I love Nixon to death, but I almost loved him to death! He drove me batty more than once (a day) and there were days that I seriously questioned myself as a mom. Surely, if I was doing the very best I could as a mom, he wouldn't be acting like such an ass! Yes, there I said it. My kid was a total ass sometimes! I still loved him, but gods alive he can be a real ass!
   However, I remind myself of a couple things: 
1) this is a mostly normal phase in every child's life, and 
2) I'll never have to go through it again. So all I have to do is survive this phase, once, with Nixon and it'll all be behind us. 

   But for a while it seemed it was never going to end. The tantrums in public were still a common occurrence no matter how many times I left a store with him throwing a tantrum. The talking back was mind-numbingly constant. And he'd talk back about everything! 
me: Nixon, what do you want for lunch?
Nixon: NOTHING! I am never going to eat...forever! 
me: Okay.
Nixon: I said I want peanut butter and jelly for lunch!
^^ true story!
   Yesterday, that all changed. I'm seriously concerned that an alien abducted my child and replaced him with a marvelous, well-behaved clone. (thank you, aliens!) 

   Nixon and I had a mommy and me date, of sorts. Mac is working nights, so I do my best to get Nixon out of the house and give Mac a couple peaceful hours of sleep. Santa was the perfect excuse to get Nixon out of the house yesterday. He hasn't seen Santa this year and it's the first year Nixon is super excited about Santa.

   We left early to beat any possible crowds.

   We arrived and found 3 families ahead of us, all with much younger kids. Nixon was not enjoying the squeaker toy the photographer was using to get the little ones attention. In fact, he hated it. (He's still sensitive to some sounds.)

    Finally, it was Nixon's turn with Santa! My goodness, Nixon just lit up and stared at Santa. He was in total awe of the man! He quickly sat on his lap and took a few photos. The photographer commented on how Nixon's smile was "too squinty". Not wanting to ruin the moment, I ignored the comment, but the bitch in me wanted to say "He's got Asian blood in him, he can't help but be squinty!" I totally said it in my mind!
   After Santa we grabbed a cookie. Mall cookies are the best, right?!?! Nixon sat quietly and ate his cookie. I think he was Santa-awed, but whatever it was I'll take it. I wasn't losing my mind and he wasn't acting an ass.     The best part of the day happened while we were in Target. I was picking up some more stocking stuffers and getting things for the cats (Arwen hates me, I bought a Santa hat with beard attached for cats and made her wear it!) 
   Nixon was on point with his "excuse me" when we were walking down a crowded area and his "please" and "thank you". I got 2 compliments on his manners. One was from an older woman who heard Nixon say "excuse me" as we walked by her. "Mom, you should be proud. I don't hear grown adults using excuse me like your son just did." The second was the cashier who said to Nixon "You have some wonderful manners, young man."! (Nixon said "please" and "may I have" when he asked for the trucks I'd bought for him)

    I could not have loved my son more at that point, if I tried! I was so proud of him AND it made me realize I'm doing a good job as his mom. 

    Am I a perfect mom? Hell no! I cuss too much, use too much sarcasm around him and I don't always keep my cool when he's acting an ass. But I'm doing somethings right because my little man uses manners and I'm not even having to prompt him to do it these days. 

    Am I a perfect mom? NO. But don't tell Nixon that. He think I'm the best mom ever. And I get hugs, kisses and "I love you, mom" all day long! Even if I'm not the most perfect mom, I'm the best mom he has and he's not screwed up yet. 

   So, yes, my kid can be an ass. But you know what? I think it's normal to be slightly ass-tastic when you're being raised by a less than perfect mom. But together, we make a pretty awesome team!

"too squinty"?? Too cute, if you ask me!

Arwen, in her Santa hat and beard.