Thursday, July 21, 2011

Why I'm jealous of my cat & Our house is trying to kill all electronics in it! are some very lucky, lucky readers today!! First I gave you a ranty, cuss-free blog this morning addressing the less than military friendly practices of HP. Now, tonight I'm giving you a twofer...that's right a two-in-one blog tonight only!

Why I'm jealous of my Cat!!

(you'll need Amber's history of how she came to be a member of our family for this to make sense, so I'll keep it as short as possible) 
Amber was originally named Bella and was once a stray with a litter of kittens. She was taken to a shelter, spayed, put up for adoption at the same time as her kittens and watched her kittens leave before she did. My sister went to that shelter, saw Bella, adopted her and took her home. Sadly, Bella was not a fan of infants and my sister had my niece to think of. Snotface (my sister) called me and asked if I could take Bella, instead of her having to return her to the shelter and say she's not good with children (Mac and I didn't have Nixon at this point). Mac and I discussed it, I made the 8 hour drive home, picked her up brought her back to Virginia and eventually we renamed her Amber (because I can't stand the name Bella...sorry, but it's just not a name anything in my house/family will ever be damned by).

Now the reasons why I'm jealous of Amber. Amber was spayed after having one litter of kittens, which she barely had to raise. Hell she never had to go through a toddler phase with her kittens! Lucky cat! Not only that, but being a cat, it would've been totally okay if she ATE one of her kittens!! She could've walked away and not taken care of any of them and we "caring" humans would've done all the hard work for her!! I mean, c'mon how fucking awesome is that?!?? Plus, cats don't pay for college, or diapers, or food. And cats don't have to potty train or deal with screeching, indepandant toddlers.
Yeah, I'm really jealous of Amber some days. 

Our house is slowly murdering all our electronics!!
We've had a rash of recent electronic deaths and near deaths this week. First we had Nixon, popping off the keys from Mac's laptop. Then we had the watery death of Mac's laptop (and the rebirth of the Zombie Laptop!! complete with missing parts). Next came the close call of my coffee maker in the Flood of the was saved (thank you Coffee Gods!!). I started to realize, some houses are cursed with ghosts and spirits, ours seems to have bad electronic mojo!
My worse fears were confirmed when tonight, in a brief moment of a flash blackout, my netbook's charger was fried! Yes, I am stupid enough to NOT have it plugged into a surge protector. So, I call Mac, trying to remain calm because I just purchased a 9 cell battery for my netbook yesterday!! While I called him, Nixon stood beside me saying "Momma, what is wrong? Are you okay, Momma? Momma, what happened?" Probably because I wasn't yelling at him and he didn't cause the broken shit, he felt like he did something wrong haha
After about 20 minutes, I tried to plug in my charger again....and it was working again.
So why wouldn't the power flicker again....within a minute of me plugging the fucking thing back in and charging my netbook again?!?!? (The reason for the new battery?? My old one holds a charge for less than an hour now...a freaking hour!! Yeah....I killed it, I realize that now.)  So, of course, I think my charger got fried...again! I unplugged it, let it cool off, and tried not to freak out. Mac had already said we'd go and try to buy a new charger tomorrow for me. So, if it's dead, it's dead. But damn this house for trying to force me back into the stone age without my permission!!! I know where to find the Amish, I could go there if I wanted too, but I like running water and gas powered vehicles, computers, iPods and Internet too damned much to just live that way. PLUS....I like setting the preset timer on my coffee marker so that it's ready for me when I wake up in the morning. I also like the tv in the bedroom, that helps me eek out an extra 30-45 minutes of sleep in the morning (thanks to dvds and Nixon's ever changing taste in shows). I like microwaves (dear house....don't even think about that one, you've been warned!). And I like air conditioning and heat, depending on the time of year. Plus, my hair straightener.....I love the time I live in and I will not go quietly backwards. Yes, I'm refusing to accept another lifestyle...because I quite like mine just fine.
Fuck you house I will NOT yield!!!!  

My charger is still working, at this time.  

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